A Veritable Pom

I said 'Off'.

As in Rhymes with 'cough' as opposed to 'orf' which is what the Saffas say.

All innocently and unexpectedly...

'Off' Just like a Pom!

Oh how we laughed.

poor snowman...............

Death of the snowman...Hoppy eyeing the carrot...

Am hoping for more snow in January.

Xmas Jigsaw

A xmas jigsaw is the most fun. Anyone who thinks this sounds boring should try it. Is fabulous. I was not good, but it was a jigsaw with which I did not bond. I am going to buy the jigsaw for next xmas.

The xmas manor was a great success. I think indeed , we will go there again.

Dr Lauren is nothing short of a genius for finding and organising all this.

Our suite was called Coralline. Caused some problems as the saffas said CoraLEEN and the poms said CoraLINE.

(a locally sourced material from shell deposits millions of years old)

The Lovely Aged Grandparents stayed in Samphire.

Samphire is an edible seaweed eaten in the bottom right hand area of the UK. (is very nice actually, bit chewy) They call it a Gastronomic Delicacy.

The Gorgeous Son has never heard of it and called the suite Hampshire. Dof boy.

Darling Simon and Dr Lauren's suite was called Provender.

(dry food for domestic livestock. Butley Mill was a provender mill)

The Gorgeous Son's suite which he shared with Adam, The Gorgeous Brother of Darling Simon, was called Lucam .

(a projection built at the top of a mill to house the hoist used to raise bags to the top of the mill)

Great Aunt Faith stayed in Mill House Number 1.

No other details. 1 is a number. There are 2 mill houses.

We didn't take up the whole place. We are only so many people.

Lordy!

So now you know.

India...my grandkitten

India had a great xmas, she especially enjoyed snooker in the games room. The owner came around to look at the heating and we had to shut her in the BBQ and Bicycles cupboard,( India, not the owner!) but she survived with no ill will. She got some fabulous presents. And only chewed one jigsaw piece. Which , luckily I found under the couch . Which should in fact make me jigsaw champion of the world but nobody else seems to see it that way.

Best Xmas table in the world

Dr Lauren's work..amazing!

Xmas Manor

In the midst of all this , was an amazing Holiday Manor. Five kitchens managed to produce a wonderful xmas meal, my department was Gammon, brussel sprouts, peas and baby corn.

Darling Simon's dad made the turkey and The Best Gravy in The World.

Great Aunt Faith was in charge of parsnips and potatoes, there were many dishes in the various kitchen and all were taken to The Great Dining Hall at the same time, no, not by some Xmas Miracle, but by the brave and amazing overseeing of DrLauren the Xmas Nazi.

Continued...

In the land that time forgot....

Children of the Corn....

Before I talk about The Xmas In The Xmas Manor, I need to set the scene.

Far far Away from London, in the County of Headless Scarecrows in the barley fields...............

xmas is coming

Doing quite well...most pressies bought, cars booked for the journey to The Holiday Cottage. Food organised. Dr Lauren's spreadsheets adhered to.
Snow OK. No more falling snow, so travel good for go. (so far)
Have bought hair colour but not applied yet. Due to having drunk a lot of Southern Comfort. Am afraid will not be able to follow instructions.
Have applied false nails. Very shiny and red and long. Why did I do this?? No idea. Is very hard to type actually.
May be result of Southern Comfort..but no... bought them before Southern Comfort was applied.
Have probably gone mad.
But nails do look lovely.
Many many things I cannot do with long nails.
Some of which would be TMI.
Cannot see nails lasting till xmas actually

A day without learning..

Today I found out what a 'saveloy' is.
Have always wondered but never been brave enough to try, so sent The Hubby to get Fish and Chips and a SAVELOY.
It is actually a cross between a vienna sausage, a frankfurter and polony.
Is disgusting.
So much for that.

Promises promises.....

winter...

I LOVE snow.

LOVE LOVE LOVE it.

The Hubby thinks I am mad.

Super secret weekend

Has been hilarious...Darling Simon arranged a secret weekend away for Dr Lauren for her birthday. It has all been very hush hush, and indeed, she has been major pissed off that nobody has arranged anything for her birthday.

We invented a fictitious weekend away working for The Hubby, she met us at the Mad Bishop and Bear pub at Paddington to say goodbye to daddy who she would not see on her birthday, poor Darling Simon was reduced to hiding in the bushes outside their house , waiting for her to leave...was all very exciting and spy like.

I had to pretend to go to the loo to sms Darling Simon. Dr Lauren thought I had an upset tummy. (had to say something...blamed the black pudding)The Hubby is not used to lying, but he did very well, better than me, because I kept smirking.

Between the 3 of us , we had so many lies going that we truly didn't know what we were doing anymore. When the train was delayed I thought I would have heart failure. Earlier, when we had the fecking BLIZZARD, we all panicked.

All worked out just fine. Dr Lauren didn't suspect a thing . The very last minute as she was going to wave Daddy onto the train, Darling Simon appeared and swept her off.

He is such a Darling boy.

We love him.

Snow!

Well, after all the promises, the snow was initially disappointing. See first pic, which is a kind of snow I have never seen before..polystyrene balls! Very Odd.

Then the snow stopped, and started again, then we had a BLIZZARD, and just look! All my footprints from earlier on have FROZEN! How cool is that? I was feeding the poor wee birds, in case you need to know why I was hopping around in my bare feet in the snow.

There is something truly wonderful about being barefoot in the snow. I love it.

The Hubby is working from home. He apparently does not appreciate the ten minute snow update. He wants to know what part of WORKING I don't understand. I thought he would like to see how much snow I was covered in after standing outside for 3 minutes. Or not.

Weather Update

It is getting quite cold. Cold as in wear a jersey all the time cold. And Socks. The papers are now saying there will be a white xmas, and weather warnings about not being on the roads...hmmm.. I have only been here for one other winter, but all sounds familiar. Obviously they learnt nothing from last year.

So, officially it will snow in London on Thursday, which is good, and means The Hubby will get home from Dublin tonight and not be trapped by the snow like last winter.

We will not be cancelling our xmas travel plans (again, like last year ) for the same reason, we have already paid for the xmas cottage.

Household tip of the day

Upholstery and carpet cleaner comes in an identical dispenser to Vanish laundry stain remover.

(apart from the writing of course, but without glasses....)

Anyway, works exactly the same, if not better.

Ripped off (voluntarily)

Saffa shop in Wimbledon has a (totally illegal) stock of Peck's ...

yes, £3.95. I bought 2.

So what's that? R90?

Bloody Hell

Anchovy toast...mmm..priceless!

Dead Snowman

Many of them about at the minute.....

Poor Foxes

I wish I could feed the foxes, but I have been told that this would be a BAD THING.

It's soooo cold and the poor things huddle beneath the ferns at the bottom of the garden. I was thinking, perhaps I could get a nice doggie bed for them? Surely that can't be too bad? I am worried that they might eat my squirrels if they are starving. Now , THAT would be a Very Bad Thing. But what if I feed them and then I move out at the end of our lease and the next people have a baby and the foxes eat the baby?

The Dutch Neighbour is always moaning about people feeding the foxes, so maybe enough people are feeding them? I don't think so, they look very hungry to me. When they are in the garden, I say 'hello little foxes' in a very loving way. So far they just GLARE at me, but I am hoping they will get to love me too.

Probably not.

TV

It takes a while to get into the TV thing, but I have got it now. I have not yet got a soap, but I do have a short list, thanks to Cousin Jane. I watched I'm a celebrity, get me out of here and I knew at least half of the celebs. I watch Loose Women and I now know what they are talking about. I like the comedy shows. I like the sitcoms. I can work the Virgin TV on demand thing. I get quite annoyed when The Hubby is home and takes over the remote control.

Tonight I watched The Chris Moyles Quiz show, then Miranda (on demand) Then Rambo, First Blood and some of the IT Crowd.

I probably watch far too much TV.

Family Visits

Cousin Jane came to stay. We had the best ever time. She understands about the sunglasses thing and wears hers all the time, just like me. She taught me a LOT about Pom stuff. She knows EVERYTHING. She is my hero.

Squirrels

I ran out of monkey nuts for my squirrels, so I put out some bread. This is what they thought of it. I don't really know what squirrel poo looks like, but if this is not squirrel poo, then the foxes didn't think much of the bread either.

MOTHER gets annoyed with my constant photo taking. She has always said I would even take pictures of poo. Well now I have.

Winter Wonderland

It's truly beautiful! I love it.

Mostly I am on my own with this. Me and Amiga Jane. Nobody else really likes the snow.

What I don't understand is why and when it snows. For example it is minus 4 today. Is cold. Is not snowing? How does that work?