Whew!

Still really hot.

I shall have to buy some Mitchums Deodorant , something I only bought in SA when it was hot in Jan/Feb, due to the fact that it was kak expensive (about R35)

Well, it costs about £3 here, which, although it is the almost the same price, suddenly seems kak cheap.

House hunting went well. Agent was quite nice, and quite jacked. Apartments were not terrible.

Village was very nice.

I didn't complain very much at all.

One apartment I saw will do at a pinch. Is OK. Is on first floor (has small balcony)

Has crap bathroom, but otherwise acceptable for a rental.

I think my standards have plummeted.

But, have high hopes for viewings tomorrow and Friday.

Still find it hard to believe I have to pay a minimum of £300 a week.

A WEEK!!

Fucking Hell.

Summer

OK is is officially HOT. Really hot, as in 30 degrees, open the doors and windows, put on the fan, and where the heck is my swimming pool when I need it hot.

We even had a braai at the SABC headquarters of The Famous Brother.

This week, in the blazing heat, this is what is happening.

MOTHER is coming to stay so she can see the Famous Brother and family

Dr Lauren is studying

The Gorgeous Son and Lovely Niece Sam are moving into their new flat.

I am househunting .

The Hubby is Working From Home.

Amiga Jane has arrived from Buenos Aires to live in London and be my friend

So, good week, all things considered.

New Brooms

Have now cleaned entire apartment. All washing done. All ironing done. All windows washed.

Everything covered in limescale de-limescaled. Kettle was particularly disgusting.

Thank you 'How Clean is your House' for household tips in this regard.

Vinegar works wonders, whole bloody apartment smells like fish and chip shop, but hey!

Cloudy lemonade cleans toilets.

Cornflour in water followed by buffing is fabulous for glass and windows.

Am I angry about not buying nice house in Caterham?

Nope.

Who cares?

Not me.

More is nog 'n dag

House update

Back to the drawing board.

Bloody hell.

Must send apologies to fuckwit broker who was probably the least fuckwittiest of the lot of them.

Sorry ex fuckwit broker.

So, plan B is to rent for another year.

Prepare for much moaning and swearing for another few weeks.

Was not quite as cross as I would have been if I had not spent the day at Wimbledon.

Yay! Wimbledon

My life is complete....after years and years and years of watching Wimbledon in the winter from under a blanket on the couch, I spent a glorious summer's day there yesterday, including seeing Federer win on Court 1.

I was the happiest person in the world.

Also, I watched some of the longest match in the world.....I left shortly after we got into the 30's...jeez, what a game!

The strawberries were £2.50 for about 10. I gave it a miss seeing as I hate cream anyway.

Lost

Just as I thought I had the underground sussed....

Wood Lane, Wood Green...how different can they be?

A lot apparently, adding an hour and a half to my original journey.

So the Elephants were at Wood Lane, not bloody Wood Green which is miles away to hell and gone past Arsenal. The elephants are being rounded up now, and are on show in various places before the auction. I would love to go to the auction but it is £75 for a ticket. A tad excessive I thought.

Nonetheless, I saw another 20 Ellies before I went to Wimbledon.

Tennis/Soccer

Today is a big soccer day seeing as England is playing. Also, it is Wimbledon.

Do I go to Wimbledon on the premise that a lot of people will be watching the soccer and I will get in easier? Do the tennis people watch soccer at all? Do I wait until tomorrow when Queenie poo's is gracing Wimbledon with her presence for the first time in 100 years? Will the Poms flock in their millions to see her? Do I want to be the only person in England at the tennis today and forever be a laughing stock as the cameras pan in on me, the only soul sitting at centre court? Will I be sent to the tower as a traitor?

Bloody hell, life is complicated here.

Uh oh!

House purchase is not looking good. I am not totally surprised seeing all the fuckwits involved are being just as stupid as they can be. The estate agents do their bit by getting into a total panic and being no use whatsoever, seeing as they never usually have to get involved and actually perform a function. The broker is worse than useless. The solicitors, however, manfully carry on, thus making sure that whether the deal goes through or not, they have performed their function and I will have to pay them. Never pausing to think 'oh wait, not all the ducks are in a row here, lets hang five' ...oh no, they just moer on ahead.

I am almost totally resigned to another year of rental.....sigh!

Water

The Poms say that us Saffas are too loud (which I have realised is true. Not as loud as the Aussies, but still loud)

They also say we are rude and abrupt (which I would call 'getting things done')

This morning I got into the shower and there was no hot water. It is a lot worse than it sounds, because I keep the shower set to the temperature that I like, so I was actually in the shower when I found out there was no hot water.

Much swearing ensued.

Then, in my new namby-pamby quiet Pom manner, I called the concierge and said " Good Morning. Sorry to trouble you, but is there a reason there is no hot water at Becquerel Court?"

Jeez. What a naff.

Vuvuzela

The Poms have now solved the pronunciation problems they have been having.

I have heard Venuzuela, vavazulu, vavazela....now they call them 'The Horns'

Much talk here of having them banned.

I must admit I didn't realise that they are blown ALL THE TIME. I thought a short blast at a goal might suffice.

I have watched some games. The SA one was very exciting, and I, along with all my fellow Poms am not impressed with the England goalie. I could have saved that goal.

Was devastated on Lovely Niece Sam's behalf for poor Australia.

I have now learnt quite a lot about soccer/football and realise that Will Carling plays rugby.

Recycling

They are recycling bevok here let me tell you...Just look!

It makes me feel terribly guilty so I do take all the bulbs and batteries to recycle, and I do take clothes and shoes for the clothes recycling bins. Darling Simon is VERY DISAPPROVING of the fact that I do not recycle properly. (Sorry Darling Simon)

But when (and if ...if the agents and brokers and attorneys ever get their act together) we move, and I have space for about 5 different dustbins, then I promise to be more environmentally aware.

Even though I actually do believe it makes fuck all difference unless everyone in the whole world recycles, which they don't.

But I will TRY.

But I am not going to wash out all the tins and containers.

Mad people

At the bus stop today a woman came up to me and asked me, if there was a person in hospital, recovering from an operation on his neck, due to an industrial accident, what colour scarf would I knit for him?

I said Blue.

Well, what else?

Saatchie again

I do love the Saatchie.....the exhibits are always...Challenging? Fascinating?

Is it Art?

Indeed, I am too ignorant to know most of the time.

Check out the 300 speakers . I just know that there was a wife somewhere that said 'Get this crap out of my house!!'

But no, and I quote

' this piece draws on notions of obsolescence and nostalgia , combining early 20th century technology and culture with a vast collection of recently discarded hi fi speakers. These disparate components are brought together through contemporary digital technology which not only distributes the sound but also controls the (found) vacuum cleaner which in turn drives the pianola' and I am stopping there because there is another whole paragraph which ends in ' a soft balance between order and chaos, organisation and it's rupture.

Basically it is a pile of 300 crap old speakers and a vacuum cleaner hose that moves. But what do I know???

Wildlife

Just look at this dear wee squirrel!

Was in Green Park, and the dear little soul actually came up to me and put it's little hands out...well, bless and shame!

I had a piece of my sandwich left over (ham and cheese from Eat, £3.25) so I gave it to him/her. Seconds later we were attacked by a million bloody pigeons which then followed me around like something from Birds.

Eek..was quite scary, both the squirrel and I fled.

But, before the attack of the birds, it was a very sweet moment....

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/music/music-news/7809597/Bon-Jovi-play-on-O2-Arena-roof.html

How cool is this? I took a walk down to the 02, and there they were...playing on the roof!

The actual concerts start tonight. Already there are a million billion tourists in Bon Jovi T shirts clogging up the bus route!

World Cup

What to do ...what to do???

After much thought and serious consideration I have decided to be on England's side.

Not that I know anything much about soccer or football, not that I even like it, actually.

This is what I have decided.

I will watch the SA games and the England games.

I feel more patriotic when I hear people sing 'God Save The Queen' than when I hear 'N'kosi Sikeleli Africa'

There is no real reason for this, it just happened.

Not that I could name even one person in either team.

Will Carling was the last one I knew. Is he still playing? Probably not.

This decision does trouble me somewhat, not that I can exactly put my finger on why.

Maybe I just want to be in with a chance.

Eating ...

Who knew Barnacles were edible??? Yummy though, even though they look like a small penis... and the crab was fabulous

Rainy London

It is now 12h 40 and is raining quite hard.

Nice and refreshing, actually.

Hope it stops soon because we are going to a sea side place tomorrow for Dr Lauren's father in law's birthday.

Hmmm.......

On the yacht

Aurelio The Elder and Aurelio The Younger.

Serious Sailing.

Excellent photographer Me

Way amazing pics taken by me!

Sunny London

It is now officially hot.

I have even sweated.

Not a lot, but sweat nonetheless.

It is sunny all day till 10 o' clock at night, and it is very very nice.

I will admit that I am now a bit of a sissy baby pom and think 25 degrees is hot, but even in SA I was not a fan of February 40 degree heat.

It gets light very early here and I am reduced to sleeping with an eye mask thingie I got from the airplane. Difficult, as if you put it on before you go to sleep it is likely to end up over your ears rather than your eyes.

When and if we move into the new house ( if the FUCKWIT BROKER will ever get his act together) I will install sunproof blinds so that I can sleep until a decent time in the morning.

Oh! It is raining. It is midnight and it is raining.

Lesson learned.

Do not ever talk about the weather.

OK. It has stopped now.

This is one weird country

Best Spanish Signs I could find

Hard to read the sign...it says 'in service of the sick'

Jesus

You will not believe!

This is NOT a statue, it is actually Jesus, in the square in Santiago. (well, not ACTUALLY Jesus, obviously)

People can have their photo's taken with him. And St James as well. How weird is that???

I would have thought that it was not allowed to pretend to be Jesus.

But what do I know?

Even I drew the line at having my photo taken with Jesus, I hope all my holy friends appreciate this gesture.

See? Spanish farm!

Spanish Farm (For My Somerset West friends)

All the years I lived in Somerset West, I thought Spanish Farm was a dof name for Spanish Farm.

Nope! Spanish farm is EXACTLY like a Spanish Farm.

The mountains, the roads, the architecture, all of it...it was sometimes just like driving up Silwerboomkloof Road.

If this stupid fuckwit programme would allow me to post some photos I would show you..

Hello.....hello...what is going on here???

!Hola!

Well, let me tell you, Spain is amazing! And nothing like what I expected. In my ignorance I imagined lots of sparse vegetation, donkeys wearing hats and for some odd reason , cacti.

(I think I was getting confused with Mexico.)

To be fair to me, we did go to Galicia, which is Northern Spain. And apparently a bit different. Certainly not full of drunken Brits eating fish and chips, so that was a relief.

The Hubby's Cousin Janet has an apartment in La Coruna, a farm, and a yacht. So splendid all round.

Us experienced sun experts from South Africa who know better did not apply sun block and fried to a crisp.

We learnt a lot of Spanish ( I had prior knowledge from Argentina) .

The Hubby did better than me, at least he refrained from speaking English in a Spanish accent.

I can't help it.

Anyway, terrible accent or not, I had a fab time.

And I steered the yacht ALL BY MYSELF , into the harbour and did the yacht equivalent of a wheelie.

So, see pics...City...Farm...Yacht..!! What a fab holiday