Sunday, August 23, 2009
most beautiful restaurant ever
Isn't this too lovely for words? As you can see it is in Drury Lane, so next time we go to the theatre we are coming here for dinner. (mainly so I can takes pics inside...you should see it, amazing.)
I thought they would frown upon me taking pics unless I was actually eating.
Summertime....
and London is magic. The Hubby and I went for a day out, and these are the wonderful things we came across on our travels......
There really are pavement artists...I thought that was just in Mary Poppins.
And freedom of speech. No problem there!
There really are pavement artists...I thought that was just in Mary Poppins.
And freedom of speech. No problem there!
Friday, August 21, 2009
Weekend
The Hubby is coming home from Ireland today. (yay!)
Lovely Niece Sam is going to stay with Dr Lauren tonight. Only one of the many reasons why she is such a Lovely Niece.
Dr Lauren bought me a Waggamamma cookbook, and combined with the fabulous See- Woo chinese shop (in walking distance) it is the best thing ever.
So tonight we are eating a Waggamamma meal.
All the ingredients you need in the book are also written in (phonetic) chinese, it is so cool, so you can ask for something IN CHINESE!!
Emboldened, I came home and talked to the next door dog, who up until now has cowered away from me)
I said 'Nam pla!' (fish sauce)
Choy sum! (flowering greens
Konbu! (seaweed)
I think we will soon be friends.
Lovely Niece Sam is going to stay with Dr Lauren tonight. Only one of the many reasons why she is such a Lovely Niece.
Dr Lauren bought me a Waggamamma cookbook, and combined with the fabulous See- Woo chinese shop (in walking distance) it is the best thing ever.
So tonight we are eating a Waggamamma meal.
All the ingredients you need in the book are also written in (phonetic) chinese, it is so cool, so you can ask for something IN CHINESE!!
Emboldened, I came home and talked to the next door dog, who up until now has cowered away from me)
I said 'Nam pla!' (fish sauce)
Choy sum! (flowering greens
Konbu! (seaweed)
I think we will soon be friends.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
30 degree day
So, seeing as it was officially the hottest day ever in the Uk , I set off for an outing.
It was great, I walked the usual 500 miles. Saw 500 new things.
Cool.
I love London.
It was great, I walked the usual 500 miles. Saw 500 new things.
Cool.
I love London.
30 degrees
The funniest ever!
30 degrees is not really that hot, and on the underground , this is what they say:
"Please be aware that in this hot weather you will need to drink extra water...if you feel ill or faint please get off at the next stop"
kak funny!
30 degrees is not really that hot, and on the underground , this is what they say:
"Please be aware that in this hot weather you will need to drink extra water...if you feel ill or faint please get off at the next stop"
kak funny!
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Plinth chap
He was so funny... he made paper aeroplanes out of A4, A3, A5 all the papers and flew them off the plinth to see which one would win. (A5 ..every time)Another guy just blew up beachballs, starting from small and working up to really big, and throwing them to the people.
The best one would take a whole page to explain, but it was kak funny.
Oh I love London! I am so going back to Trafalgar Square!
Trafalgar Square
The Mayor has set up all these deckchairs in Trafalgar Square...can you just imagine?I took my book and some fruit and water and went to the square for the day... it was fabulous!
I had forgotten about the 4th plinth, that there are people there, one every hour, each doing something! The one guy tossed buttered slices of toast off the plinth to see if they landed butter up or butter down! I have applied to go on the plinth, as you can see...
Monday, August 17, 2009
Politically Incorrect
I just have to be politically incorrect. I am going to try very very hard to put this in the right way (Sorry Dr Lauren)
I am going to get it all over with in one posting. And then I won't do it again.
BUT I could say that I met these 2 people who would move my stuff from the storage. Not very interesting is it?
So... I met a vertically challenged (achondroplasia), and Dr Lauren says it is OK to say Dwarf because it is a medical term, white ( I am white so that is OK too) who is married (2 weeks) to a (not dwarf) lady from Lagos. Who will charge me £30 to move my stuff from storage to the apartment. This is a good deal as a street van costs £35 .
She showed me her wedding photos . She said the wedding cost £8000. I way outdid her on wedding day costs, but luckily fixed the price for the removals before we discussed wedding costs.
She was concerned about her photos as they did not all turn out so well, because of the flash. I told her the flash didn't go off because the person taking the pictures stood against the light.
See?? How good was I????? Sadly, she was just about invisible in all the pictures. White hubby was fine, her...not so much.
So Next
My neighbour.
Actually all my neighbours are Chinese. Everybody in the whole of Greenwich is Chinese. I am terrified that I will see my neighbour in Asda and not recognise her. I am sure she has the same concerns about me. See? Am being nice.
And again
My Self Storage person , Karolina, got married today. Actually she got married on Saturday as well (civil ceremony)
So this was a Muslim ceremony.
Sorry Zurina, but how would you like Abdul Saleem to marry a pregnant Polish girl?
How can A Polish Person be a Muslim?
I am concerned about my storage.
Neighbour Girl
This girl is amazing. If anyone has watched Catherine Tate, this girl is just so like her that it is not funny.
Also she is a ginger (Ok this is not me, this is a UK rascist thing, I for the record have no problem with ginger people)
But my god this child is a nightmare! She is about 14 and today she actually came on the bus with me and went from the bus stop to Sainsburys which is absolutely crazy as she could walk it...it is not far! I was going to Asda which is further, but still walkable and i am 3 times her age. (actually probably 5 times)
This is what she said last week .
(I can hear her if I open my lounge door)
Well yeah fuck, when my sister was well pregnant then we all said like well what and then my mother well slapped her , and when I get pregnant I will not even well tell anyone..........and she went on like this ?And the next conversation I heard her say ( to a very sweet looking boy who is about 8)
Well yes , yeah and you well have to have sex when you are well 14........
And apart from this conversation she says fuck way more than I do.
Lordy lordy
Time to move to the country I think.
Lastly
A chap who is...what can I say? beveragly disavantaged? (see? Still trying to be politically correct)
Very very handsome, quite young...late 20's ,early thirties?
I previously saw him in the doctors rooms when I was waiting to see Kerry the Smoking Councellor. He was somewhat odd then.
When I came home today he was lying in front of the lobby door. Pissed as a coot.
He told me I was lovely and beautiful.
I told him if he didn't move I would call the concierge.
Time to move to the country
I am going to get it all over with in one posting. And then I won't do it again.
BUT I could say that I met these 2 people who would move my stuff from the storage. Not very interesting is it?
So... I met a vertically challenged (achondroplasia), and Dr Lauren says it is OK to say Dwarf because it is a medical term, white ( I am white so that is OK too) who is married (2 weeks) to a (not dwarf) lady from Lagos. Who will charge me £30 to move my stuff from storage to the apartment. This is a good deal as a street van costs £35 .
She showed me her wedding photos . She said the wedding cost £8000. I way outdid her on wedding day costs, but luckily fixed the price for the removals before we discussed wedding costs.
She was concerned about her photos as they did not all turn out so well, because of the flash. I told her the flash didn't go off because the person taking the pictures stood against the light.
See?? How good was I????? Sadly, she was just about invisible in all the pictures. White hubby was fine, her...not so much.
So Next
My neighbour.
Actually all my neighbours are Chinese. Everybody in the whole of Greenwich is Chinese. I am terrified that I will see my neighbour in Asda and not recognise her. I am sure she has the same concerns about me. See? Am being nice.
And again
My Self Storage person , Karolina, got married today. Actually she got married on Saturday as well (civil ceremony)
So this was a Muslim ceremony.
Sorry Zurina, but how would you like Abdul Saleem to marry a pregnant Polish girl?
How can A Polish Person be a Muslim?
I am concerned about my storage.
Neighbour Girl
This girl is amazing. If anyone has watched Catherine Tate, this girl is just so like her that it is not funny.
Also she is a ginger (Ok this is not me, this is a UK rascist thing, I for the record have no problem with ginger people)
But my god this child is a nightmare! She is about 14 and today she actually came on the bus with me and went from the bus stop to Sainsburys which is absolutely crazy as she could walk it...it is not far! I was going to Asda which is further, but still walkable and i am 3 times her age. (actually probably 5 times)
This is what she said last week .
(I can hear her if I open my lounge door)
Well yeah fuck, when my sister was well pregnant then we all said like well what and then my mother well slapped her , and when I get pregnant I will not even well tell anyone..........and she went on like this ?And the next conversation I heard her say ( to a very sweet looking boy who is about 8)
Well yes , yeah and you well have to have sex when you are well 14........
And apart from this conversation she says fuck way more than I do.
Lordy lordy
Time to move to the country I think.
Lastly
A chap who is...what can I say? beveragly disavantaged? (see? Still trying to be politically correct)
Very very handsome, quite young...late 20's ,early thirties?
I previously saw him in the doctors rooms when I was waiting to see Kerry the Smoking Councellor. He was somewhat odd then.
When I came home today he was lying in front of the lobby door. Pissed as a coot.
He told me I was lovely and beautiful.
I told him if he didn't move I would call the concierge.
Time to move to the country
Rubbish Bags
Ok, those rubbish bags are worse than useless, thank you bloody Sainsburys £2 odd for 15 crap bags.
The whole thing broke as I was taking it out of the pedal bin, not the recycling pedal bin, oh no, that would be too easy to have nice clean recycled stuff spill out all over the Kelim rug. No, no, it was the not recycleable, all the Short Product Life rotting crap and leftovers and fruit peelings and bloody 5 a day shit leftovers.
Now I know why they call them 'Bin Liners' That's all they do...sodding line the bin.
Jesus Christ will somebody send me a roll of Jiffy Bags please.
The whole thing broke as I was taking it out of the pedal bin, not the recycling pedal bin, oh no, that would be too easy to have nice clean recycled stuff spill out all over the Kelim rug. No, no, it was the not recycleable, all the Short Product Life rotting crap and leftovers and fruit peelings and bloody 5 a day shit leftovers.
Now I know why they call them 'Bin Liners' That's all they do...sodding line the bin.
Jesus Christ will somebody send me a roll of Jiffy Bags please.
Monday
Monday is housework day and I must say it is much easier without The Hubby under my feet. So all is clean and sparkly and I have hung up all the pictures I got out of storage and I am jolly well going to get all the rest and hang those too. Bloody Landlords and their rules. These are not real walls in the apartment anyway. I am quite happy to pay for them all to be repainted, I can't go 6 months without my pictures. I will post a photo later, the place is looking quite good now.
I keep trying to move and rearrange the furniture, but there seems to be just one spot for everything to go.
The Rubbish bags were better. Not great, but better.
The toothpaste I bought tastes like Vim.
Flash cleans nothing.
What is this 'I can't believe it's Butter'? I can't even believe it's margarine.
Come on you guys who live here...help me out a bit. It's going to take me years to work my way through all this stuff.
Thanks to Lovely Niece Sam, I found Feta Cheese.
Cillit Bang Power Cleaner is good.
Bread goes off after 2 days? Why?
I keep trying to move and rearrange the furniture, but there seems to be just one spot for everything to go.
The Rubbish bags were better. Not great, but better.
The toothpaste I bought tastes like Vim.
Flash cleans nothing.
What is this 'I can't believe it's Butter'? I can't even believe it's margarine.
Come on you guys who live here...help me out a bit. It's going to take me years to work my way through all this stuff.
Thanks to Lovely Niece Sam, I found Feta Cheese.
Cillit Bang Power Cleaner is good.
Bread goes off after 2 days? Why?
Dublin
Hmmm...The Hubby is having far too good a time in Dublin without me. Everytime he phones he is in a pub, with an Irish jig playing in the background. Yesterday he cut out the middleman and went straight to the Brewery. He has an Irish accent, but I know that's just the Guinness talking.
I am going back with him next week, before he starts the River Dance.
I am going back with him next week, before he starts the River Dance.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
O2
I am going to the o2 now to meet up with Darling Simon's parents and we are going to see dead bodies at Bodyworld. Just suits my mood right now.
http://www.visitlondon.com/bodyworlds/
The Hubby is in Dublin so it is just me and Lovely Niece Sam, if the Bodyworlds doesn't put me off , I was planning a beef stew for supper.
http://www.visitlondon.com/bodyworlds/
The Hubby is in Dublin so it is just me and Lovely Niece Sam, if the Bodyworlds doesn't put me off , I was planning a beef stew for supper.
they are everywhere
Smoking Risks
Learn about the negative effects of cigarettes and quit now.
www.nhs.uk/smokefree
This is what came up on my blog page after I had posted my latest
hee hee hee
This is what came up on my blog page after I had posted my latest
hee hee hee
Rubbish .
It has been a BAD morning.
First of all, they don't even say Rubbish Bags, they say 'Bin Liners'.
I have bought 2 lots which have been terrible, and I went to Sainburys to be confronted by 5 shelves of 'bin liners'
I hate shopping in shops anyway...anyone who knows me knows that.
I actually was reduced to tears. By rubbish bags.
This is the first time I have been homesick.
I bought the most expensive ones there. £2.89 for 15
I also bought cashew nuts.
And 10 cigarettes. (smoking confession #2)
So...I smoked a cigarette as I was stomping my way home and remembered I had left behind my prescription from Smoking Councellor Kerry.
I swore very loudly, dropped the cigarette and went back to the pharmacy.
On the way back out i threw the oh bloody hell now what?? How am in in italics??
Oh ok.
anyway as I was saying before the italics, I threw the rest of the cigarettes on the seat at the bus stop outside the shop , next to a girl who was smoking and told her she would be bloody sorry when she was my age.
Then I ate all the cashew nuts.
I'll let you know how the rubbish bags work out.
First of all, they don't even say Rubbish Bags, they say 'Bin Liners'.
I have bought 2 lots which have been terrible, and I went to Sainburys to be confronted by 5 shelves of 'bin liners'
I hate shopping in shops anyway...anyone who knows me knows that.
I actually was reduced to tears. By rubbish bags.
This is the first time I have been homesick.
I bought the most expensive ones there. £2.89 for 15
I also bought cashew nuts.
And 10 cigarettes. (smoking confession #2)
So...I smoked a cigarette as I was stomping my way home and remembered I had left behind my prescription from Smoking Councellor Kerry.
I swore very loudly, dropped the cigarette and went back to the pharmacy.
On the way back out i threw the oh bloody hell now what?? How am in in italics??
Oh ok.
anyway as I was saying before the italics, I threw the rest of the cigarettes on the seat at the bus stop outside the shop , next to a girl who was smoking and told her she would be bloody sorry when she was my age.
Then I ate all the cashew nuts.
I'll let you know how the rubbish bags work out.
Friday, August 7, 2009
5 a day update
Today I ate
1 mango
3 kiwi fruit
glass orange juice
handful of lettuce greens
3 strawberries
10 tons of popcorn. Other stuff i would rather not mention.
So about 3 and a half today
Fuck
Try for 7 tomorrow
1 mango
3 kiwi fruit
glass orange juice
handful of lettuce greens
3 strawberries
10 tons of popcorn. Other stuff i would rather not mention.
So about 3 and a half today
Fuck
Try for 7 tomorrow
internet shopping problem
My problem, not their fault...they do say 'short product life'
They DON'T say 'expires the second you open the packet.
They also don't say 'don't buy a lot of this stuff it all rots in about 22 seconds.'
Today I have learnt:
Cherry yoghurt...yukkky yukky tastes like marzipan
Buy expensive brandy. I now have 2 bottles in the cupboard that are undrinkable. I am keeping them for my mother.
Iron dry and store dry on the tumble drier are very different.
Husbands very quickly go off if they are home all day
Very few people know how hard it is to stop smoking
PMS and no smoking are a BAD combination
They DON'T say 'expires the second you open the packet.
They also don't say 'don't buy a lot of this stuff it all rots in about 22 seconds.'
Today I have learnt:
Cherry yoghurt...yukkky yukky tastes like marzipan
Buy expensive brandy. I now have 2 bottles in the cupboard that are undrinkable. I am keeping them for my mother.
Iron dry and store dry on the tumble drier are very different.
Husbands very quickly go off if they are home all day
Very few people know how hard it is to stop smoking
PMS and no smoking are a BAD combination
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Latest Internet shop
Was much much better.
Only problem is, we are only 3 people in the house. Lovely niece Sam, Hubby and me.
This is what we have
3 mangoes, 3 grape fruit, 3 Avo's
Apples, (lots , sam bought them not me, so not the one apple thing)
Redcurrants, blackcurrants, strawberries, plums, kiwi fruit, oranges, Jesus Christ we have the whole garden of Eden here there is no way we are going to eat all this stuff.
The 4 large packets of celery may be a problem but I can do celery soup (yuk)
Otherwise I did just fine. Apart from buying too much bread and I can't fit it in all the deepfreeze.
But this has been my most ever successful internet grocery shop !! Yay for me!
Oh and yes well maybe we will have to eat a lot of mushrooms.
Only problem is, we are only 3 people in the house. Lovely niece Sam, Hubby and me.
This is what we have
3 mangoes, 3 grape fruit, 3 Avo's
Apples, (lots , sam bought them not me, so not the one apple thing)
Redcurrants, blackcurrants, strawberries, plums, kiwi fruit, oranges, Jesus Christ we have the whole garden of Eden here there is no way we are going to eat all this stuff.
The 4 large packets of celery may be a problem but I can do celery soup (yuk)
Otherwise I did just fine. Apart from buying too much bread and I can't fit it in all the deepfreeze.
But this has been my most ever successful internet grocery shop !! Yay for me!
Oh and yes well maybe we will have to eat a lot of mushrooms.
5 a day
I had a lot of blog subjects to post today, and then I had the Most Exciting Birthday Surprise and now I feel I may be posting too many blog entries at once.
The problem is, if I don't post them as I remember, they are gone forever in the murky pool that my addled brain is becoming.
So, where was I?
Oh yes 5 a day.
5 a day is I think almost, if not actually government policy here. I am certainly taking it very seriously. It is not all that easy, but I do my best.
Today, for example, I had 4 Kiwi fruit for breakfast, a lot of celery (I somehow ordered 4 packets of celery, much larger packets than I expected, on my latest internet shop)
Then I had a portion of spinach greens for my lunch , with mackerel (how healthy am I? I hope you are all kak impressed.)
And 3 carrots.
The celery and carrots I hold like cigarettes, makes me feel soooooo much better.
It is very hard to get to 5 a day.
Dr Lauren told me that the actual WHO is 7 a day, but the Brits decided that was a bit intimidating so they went for 5 a day.
So it is actually not 5 a day.
Ok . I give up, I am adding grapes (wine) and juniper (gin) and potatoes (vodka)
7 a day! No problem!
The problem is, if I don't post them as I remember, they are gone forever in the murky pool that my addled brain is becoming.
So, where was I?
Oh yes 5 a day.
5 a day is I think almost, if not actually government policy here. I am certainly taking it very seriously. It is not all that easy, but I do my best.
Today, for example, I had 4 Kiwi fruit for breakfast, a lot of celery (I somehow ordered 4 packets of celery, much larger packets than I expected, on my latest internet shop)
Then I had a portion of spinach greens for my lunch , with mackerel (how healthy am I? I hope you are all kak impressed.)
And 3 carrots.
The celery and carrots I hold like cigarettes, makes me feel soooooo much better.
It is very hard to get to 5 a day.
Dr Lauren told me that the actual WHO is 7 a day, but the Brits decided that was a bit intimidating so they went for 5 a day.
So it is actually not 5 a day.
Ok . I give up, I am adding grapes (wine) and juniper (gin) and potatoes (vodka)
7 a day! No problem!
Yes! Brel!
My very very favourite that I last saw at Theatre on the Bay, and before that performed by Lauricka Rauch on one of the very first dates Hubby and I went on in Hillbrow.
It was fantastic. I cried all the way through Marieke, Sons of , Tenderness, If we only have Love, actually cried through most of them...Claire Watling was great.
Oh , and this was at the Jermyn Street Theatre which is terribly intimate (small) (and a bit tatty)
Dr Lauren asked why we were watching a SA production of a Belgian singer, in London. I know she booked it, because she knows I love Brel, but she doesn't understand and neither do I. As always, a very good question. Any answers will be appreciated. I do know that Moira Lister made it her life's ambition that this show should be performed at the Jermyn , but why??
Anyway it was just one of the most fabulous nights of my life, and very very special to have Dr Lauren to share it with me.
Oh and just see...another pic....
Dinner
After the fabulous amazing hair experience we travelled by tube...quite a long way, ending up in Piccadilly and going to a very fancy 'otel for a meal.
We ordered different meals and shared them halvey halvey.
So for starters we shared potted shrimps and sirloin carpaccio.
For mains, calves liver and Truffle pasta. With the liver came a fried Quails egg. (shame...ooops I mean, bless)
And we had a very nice Argentinian wine.
yummy yummy yummy.
Then it rained. And rained and rained.
We had to leave, and ran from doorway to doorway with our free tube newspapers held over our heads in a vain attemp to keep dry.
A true gentleman took pity on our plight and let us share his umbrella. However, he took more pity on the lovely Dr Lauren in her damp and revealing clothes than poor me who trotted behind with the drips from the back of the umbrella making me more wet than the previous protection of my newspaper.
Raining on MY HAIR.
And then there was more!
YES! Tony and Guy
I was welcomed at the door, my pashmina was whipped off and hung up, my purchases (see bag in photo) stowed in a cupboard ,and I was dressed in a very swish robe.
I was taken to my seat, brought coffee and 3 magazines, all dated August 2009. Hello, Grazias and Country Life. (Bloody hell Princess Eugenie is an ugly child)
And a biscuit .
Then the colourist arrived . Peggy. We discussed colour. Then the Hairdresser arrived. Andreus. We discussed cut. More coffee. Another biscuit.
Colour applied. Lovely restful reading brand new magazines period, punctuated by more coffee.
Hair rinsed by totally different person from the welcoming person, the coffee person or the magazine person . In a separate (quiet and peaceful) hair rinsing room. With nice music.
Change of clothes and towels and back to the chair. Andreus returned. Wearing his black suit. He approved of the colour. He called the colourist to approve the colour. She approved. I approved. The coffee girl approved.
Andreus said
" I vill get my kit" He disappeared for 5 seconds and returned with 'the kit'
Phew! we were set for THE CUT.
I have NEVER had such a dramatic cut in my life . It was FABULOUS. I felt like applauding.
Andreus removed his jacket with a big sigh for the blow drying.
When he was finished, we were both exhausted.
Dr Lauren had already paid (I don't know how much because nobody was allowed to tell me, but I know it cost more than a month's rent at Buckingham Palace)
I was undressed from my hairdressing outfit, brushed down, fluffed up, Andreus carried my handbag, Peggy, the colourist ran up and gave me her card. Andreus, too gave me his card. My pashmina was returned to my shoulders, my shopping bag to my hand. The receptionist blew me a kiss and gave me a complimentary Tony and Guy Magazine.
It was fantastic...and the day was not yet over! More surprise......
Surprise Surprise
You will not BELIEVE the day I have had today!
It started of in a very ordinary way, I washed the many times aformentioned kak floors, did the washing, cleaned the kitchen (don't wish for granite tops...I always did & I hate them)
It is hot and muggy here, i was sweating and cursing...the internet grocery shopping arrived ( more of that later)
and then....Dr Lauren phoned.
And said 'Surprise! It's your birthday surprise!'
I was surprised, mainly because it's not my birthday, but then...if it had actually been my birthday, would I have been surprised?? Well, no, of course not.
So, now, see the photo and look where I went first!!
It started of in a very ordinary way, I washed the many times aformentioned kak floors, did the washing, cleaned the kitchen (don't wish for granite tops...I always did & I hate them)
It is hot and muggy here, i was sweating and cursing...the internet grocery shopping arrived ( more of that later)
and then....Dr Lauren phoned.
And said 'Surprise! It's your birthday surprise!'
I was surprised, mainly because it's not my birthday, but then...if it had actually been my birthday, would I have been surprised?? Well, no, of course not.
So, now, see the photo and look where I went first!!
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Kitchen Appliances
On the right is my fridge. It is great, it is disguised as a cupboard, as is my dishwasher. There is a term for this but I have been out of estate agency for so long that I have forgotten it.
The only problem with the Cupboard/Fridge, is no fridge magnets.
However, I have cleverly solved this.
On the left, also in my kitchen, on the wall opposite the fridge, is a heater. There is one in every room. It is magnetic .
Problem solved.
Of course, in winter, I may need to rethink this.
It is for the moment rapidly filling up. I have decided to buy a fridge magnet everywhere we go. I only decided this in Paris, so for the moment I have only one, of the pyramid glass thing at the Louvre. Also a Gustav Klimt (the kiss)that Dr Lauren brought back for me from Vienna. Then the ones I brought with me, Debonaires Pizza, Scooters Pizza, Denny Mushrooms, HTH Pool systems (?) and a magnet my friend Pat Aitken Cade bought for me years and years ago.
I also have bought knickers wherever I have been, so far have Amsterdam and Paris, but my friend Charna would say that is Too Much Information .
Electrical Appliances
This is a plug. Specifically it is a plug on the end of a hand held mixer that I bought. On the right you will see what looks like an ordinary plug. Not really ordinary to me because it looks different to a SA plug. And as it turns out , not ordinary at all.Just try and plug it in the wall...no..it doesn't fit. It doesn't fit because of the plastic cover (picture left) that you have to remove first. How would I know this?? I tried to shove the stupid thing into the wall. Why? Why is there a cover?
Health and Safety my ass. There should be a sticker saying remove plastic thing. We are not all bloody psychic.
Ice Ice baby
Here, on your cell (mobile) it is the done thing to list your significant other, or your mother, or whoever you would call, under ICE in your phone book.
This is what Dr Lauren told me after I got to her phone a second too late to answer it and told her a rap artist was looking for her.
"No, Mommy" said she in the tones used for "Ohmigod is my Mother going to be a moron for her entire stay in the UK"
Apparently it stands for 'In case of emergency' and EVERYBODY is in the know, so should there be an emergency they would know who to call.
I thought this was a very good idea. I changed Paul to Ice.
Unfortunately I forgot all about this about a week later when I wanted to call him. His number was not in my phonebook. It went straight from Nicola (my hairdresser and good friend in SA) to Peter. My ex husband.
How can I have the first husband's number and not my 2nd husband's number? (keeps him on his toes if he thinks there may be a number 3)
I said this out loud in a tone of bewilderment to the people around me in Canary Wharf Station.
I don't care if they think I'm mad, nobody wants to be my friend anyway.
I scrolled through my phonebook to see what other numbers where missing.
I got to 'I' and the penny dropped.
Silly me.
This is what Dr Lauren told me after I got to her phone a second too late to answer it and told her a rap artist was looking for her.
"No, Mommy" said she in the tones used for "Ohmigod is my Mother going to be a moron for her entire stay in the UK"
Apparently it stands for 'In case of emergency' and EVERYBODY is in the know, so should there be an emergency they would know who to call.
I thought this was a very good idea. I changed Paul to Ice.
Unfortunately I forgot all about this about a week later when I wanted to call him. His number was not in my phonebook. It went straight from Nicola (my hairdresser and good friend in SA) to Peter. My ex husband.
How can I have the first husband's number and not my 2nd husband's number? (keeps him on his toes if he thinks there may be a number 3)
I said this out loud in a tone of bewilderment to the people around me in Canary Wharf Station.
I don't care if they think I'm mad, nobody wants to be my friend anyway.
I scrolled through my phonebook to see what other numbers where missing.
I got to 'I' and the penny dropped.
Silly me.
Monday, August 3, 2009
smoking confession#1
#1 Because i am assuming there will be more.
Ok, to my holy- poly friends, I have now realised why confession works.
And why people do it.
Catholic and Anglican ones, obviously. You know who you are. I don't think the new age religious people do confession.
When I was in Paris, Paul had an interview where a guy called him from Canada so he had to be in a quiet place (the hotel)
So off he went and I walked about 10 million miles and ended up in a bistro ( because I needed to pee)
Note : Don't go to Gallery Lafeyette- no normal person can afford anything in the whole shop. You cannot even afford to pee there. The only reason i went was because they have a 3000 sq m shoe department. I did this for Moira. There are things I do for you, Moira, that you have no idea or appreciation of.
Anyway...at the bistro, on the table where I sat, was an abandoned, whole, brand new cigarette! (Dunhill , red) Disappointingly, not a gauloise (or however the fuck you spell it)
Of course, I smoked it. I saw it as a sign that I should enjoy Paris to the full.
It was FANTASTIC. I loved it.
Kerry the Smoking Councellor said it was not a sign. It was a TEST.
Obviously I failed miserably. She was not impressed that I failed THE TEST.
She did not see it as a sign. Not even a bit.
Anyway, back to the confession thing... I felt so much better after I told Kerry the Councellor about the stray cigarette.
She said it was OK. I was resolved and forgiven.
Thanks be to Kerry
I am so not telling Dr Lauren, she will probably kill me
Ok, to my holy- poly friends, I have now realised why confession works.
And why people do it.
Catholic and Anglican ones, obviously. You know who you are. I don't think the new age religious people do confession.
When I was in Paris, Paul had an interview where a guy called him from Canada so he had to be in a quiet place (the hotel)
So off he went and I walked about 10 million miles and ended up in a bistro ( because I needed to pee)
Note : Don't go to Gallery Lafeyette- no normal person can afford anything in the whole shop. You cannot even afford to pee there. The only reason i went was because they have a 3000 sq m shoe department. I did this for Moira. There are things I do for you, Moira, that you have no idea or appreciation of.
Anyway...at the bistro, on the table where I sat, was an abandoned, whole, brand new cigarette! (Dunhill , red) Disappointingly, not a gauloise (or however the fuck you spell it)
Of course, I smoked it. I saw it as a sign that I should enjoy Paris to the full.
It was FANTASTIC. I loved it.
Kerry the Smoking Councellor said it was not a sign. It was a TEST.
Obviously I failed miserably. She was not impressed that I failed THE TEST.
She did not see it as a sign. Not even a bit.
Anyway, back to the confession thing... I felt so much better after I told Kerry the Councellor about the stray cigarette.
She said it was OK. I was resolved and forgiven.
Thanks be to Kerry
I am so not telling Dr Lauren, she will probably kill me
Smoking
This post is for my smoking friends.
As in 'Why should I suffer alone?'
But still.... a fact
When I went to my first Smoking Counsellor Session with Kerry The Smoking Counsellor, my carbon monoxide reading was 18. It is now 1. It went from 18 to 13 to 4 to 1 (with an 8 inbetween)
For the record, I actually don't give a fuck, I would rather have a cigarette, but I am not going to.
I am not going to for the following reasons:
1) Dr Lauren has been fabulously supportive and nice and I have almost (not quite) forgiven her for making me do this.
2) This has been so kak hard that there is no way i am starting it all over again
3)Kerry my Smoking Counsellor is so nice. I would never have come this far without her.
4) My blood pressure is lower (with no medication)
5)The whole NHS thing is so kak impressive that it's hard to renege
As in 'Why should I suffer alone?'
But still.... a fact
When I went to my first Smoking Counsellor Session with Kerry The Smoking Counsellor, my carbon monoxide reading was 18. It is now 1. It went from 18 to 13 to 4 to 1 (with an 8 inbetween)
For the record, I actually don't give a fuck, I would rather have a cigarette, but I am not going to.
I am not going to for the following reasons:
1) Dr Lauren has been fabulously supportive and nice and I have almost (not quite) forgiven her for making me do this.
2) This has been so kak hard that there is no way i am starting it all over again
3)Kerry my Smoking Counsellor is so nice. I would never have come this far without her.
4) My blood pressure is lower (with no medication)
5)The whole NHS thing is so kak impressive that it's hard to renege
Swine Flu
You can now fart on the tube, that's OK...but don't sneeze......
Quite a few people wear masks.
Mostly Japanese people, which , after I commented, JP pointed out to me that they wear them if they have a cold, and they do so to protect others.
Sorry Japanese people, I seriously misjudged the situation there.
Thought you were a tad paranoid.
Turns out I was a tad ignorant.
Quite a few people wear masks.
Mostly Japanese people, which , after I commented, JP pointed out to me that they wear them if they have a cold, and they do so to protect others.
Sorry Japanese people, I seriously misjudged the situation there.
Thought you were a tad paranoid.
Turns out I was a tad ignorant.
Darling Simon
Darling Simon took Dr Lauren to Vienna.
I am liking this mystery weekend thing. It is my birthday very soon.
I hope I am going to have a mystery weekend trip. I will speak to Dr Lauren about in just in case Paul doesn't think of it all by himself.
He is not as good as Darling Simon in the surprise and romantic stakes
I am thinking Germany. I can at least speak some German. Quite a lot actually.
Dr Lauren and Darling Simon arrive back this evening.
I am liking this mystery weekend thing. It is my birthday very soon.
I hope I am going to have a mystery weekend trip. I will speak to Dr Lauren about in just in case Paul doesn't think of it all by himself.
He is not as good as Darling Simon in the surprise and romantic stakes
I am thinking Germany. I can at least speak some German. Quite a lot actually.
Dr Lauren and Darling Simon arrive back this evening.
Last paris comment (promise!)
In case you think Paris is all fabulous....
1) Beggars. Bloody hell, there are lots of them.
They are all gypsy type beggars and they say 'Do you speak English' (obviously in a gypsy type accent) First time, of course, I said Yes.
Then they hand you a note saying how poor and etc etc they are and ask for money. After the 11th one I was saying 'Nee, glad nie, gaan kak in die mielies' Had no problems after that.
2) Rats
After nightfall, they come out. Esplanade de la Ratatouille.
I have NEVER in my entire life seen so many rats. Do not walk near dustbins. Do not walk near water.
Yukky Yukky Yukky. Not so romantic. I made Paul walk on the rat side of the esplanade.
3) Tourists
Yes, I know I was one. But in the Notre Dame, there was one of the side chapels where a family was praying at an altar to an obviously dead family member (there were photos and purple ribbons) and a tourist actually went into the chapel thingie (about the size of a dining room) and took photos. That was tacky.
Even me, the atheist , would not do that.
See? And you thought I was so bad? Hah! I didn't even blow out any of the candles.
1) Beggars. Bloody hell, there are lots of them.
They are all gypsy type beggars and they say 'Do you speak English' (obviously in a gypsy type accent) First time, of course, I said Yes.
Then they hand you a note saying how poor and etc etc they are and ask for money. After the 11th one I was saying 'Nee, glad nie, gaan kak in die mielies' Had no problems after that.
2) Rats
After nightfall, they come out. Esplanade de la Ratatouille.
I have NEVER in my entire life seen so many rats. Do not walk near dustbins. Do not walk near water.
Yukky Yukky Yukky. Not so romantic. I made Paul walk on the rat side of the esplanade.
3) Tourists
Yes, I know I was one. But in the Notre Dame, there was one of the side chapels where a family was praying at an altar to an obviously dead family member (there were photos and purple ribbons) and a tourist actually went into the chapel thingie (about the size of a dining room) and took photos. That was tacky.
Even me, the atheist , would not do that.
See? And you thought I was so bad? Hah! I didn't even blow out any of the candles.
Vin Paris
deux verres vin rouge
€24
Bloody hell
Christine, if you are reading this...how is the French?
Tuileries Gardens
The statues in the gardens are fabulous.
But this is just hilarious. I think it is the funniest photo I have ever taken.
Ok, Competition time....best caption wins a loud round of applause!
Parking
This is how they park in Paris! All the cars have dinged bumpers. They just moer into the car behind and in front until they can get out. I would have loved to see this car get out of there!
Paris
I really do love Paris.
Apart from the language, but I know a lot of French words. Not many sentences.
It is amazing how well you can do just by pointing and saying the word you know. I bought 2 stamps for postcards to South Africa. I said 'deux' and 'Afrique du Sud' and pointed at the cards.
Clever huh?
Everyone was nice to me, must have been because they thought I was French. Or not. Probably thought I was retarded.
Apart from the language, but I know a lot of French words. Not many sentences.
It is amazing how well you can do just by pointing and saying the word you know. I bought 2 stamps for postcards to South Africa. I said 'deux' and 'Afrique du Sud' and pointed at the cards.
Clever huh?
Everyone was nice to me, must have been because they thought I was French. Or not. Probably thought I was retarded.
Sunday, August 2, 2009
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