Animal Rights

I do love PC terms, truly I do.
And I am very PC (unlike MOTHER ...god knows how I did not grow up and join the KKK with the influences I had to endure)

We should no longer say 'pet'
What is better, is 'animal companion'

I must say that I do prefer this.
Well done there...PC brigade.

Wild Life. Also not good.
'Free Living'
Is better. Is Hoppy 'wild life'? I think not.

Whilst on the subject,  I am devastated. Have not seen Hoppy for nearly 3 weeks.
Hate to say this, but MOTHER has been here for 3 weeks.
Coincidence???
Hmmmm......

Pub From Hell

Am doomed
MOTHER really likes The Crap Pub, because, she feels sorry for it.
She thinks it can only get better. (never going to happen)
She was charmed by the fact that they were planting wee seedlings in the pots in the so called garden.
So, both The Hubby and MOTHER have made me go again and again to The Crap Pub.

It is unimaginably awful.
On the way out today, I found this out. They have a cheese evening.

 http://www.homagedefromage.co.uk/

Taste cheese...and then make cheese art.
Strangely, this has made me start to have an interest....maybe The Hubby has a point....it sure is different!
Odd can be interesting...
No!
No!
Ugly is ugly....

More Domestics

I now have stainless steel wipes, computer and TV screen wipes, think I am sorted in the wipes department.
Also in the microfibre cloths department.

www.lakeland.co.uk

Has to be the best shop ever.

There is every single labour saving device known to man in that shop. A solution for everything. Cleaning made easy for us Poms who do our own housework.

I have never before invested in these things. How many Saffa 'madams' would consider buying all this stuff for the maid to use?
Or spend over R1000 on an iron?
 I make my life easier for myself without much of a thought to cost. This does not make me feel bad.
I do feel bad , however, that I did not give enough thought to making cleaning easier for Gertrude when she worked for me.
Especially the crap iron. I feel really bad about that.

On the MOTHER front

Yesterday MOTHER went to visit a friend whom she has not seen for 53 years.
Admittedly, (Google is your friend) I did find this friend for her.
It is amazing , the lengths one will go to, to have a day of peace and quiet.

So, today, I have cleaned, vacuumed, polished, read, and had a lovely day altogether.

Went to Clapham Junction at 5pm to fetch MOTHER.
You may not know this, but Clapham Junction is the busiest station in the whole of Europe.
Peak Hour.
There was also a fucking monsoon.
 HAIL!
(or what they call hail in this country..little teeny weeny balls)
THUNDER! LIGHTNING!
So, here am I ..soaked to the skin..peering through a waterfall , looking for MOTHER , who , let me tell you, was less than impressed with the weather.
Is my fault, seeing as I told her the weather is better in London.
When I left Surbiton, it was bright sunshine...if I had known it was going to rain like that I would have taken an umbrella.
But, here, there is no warning. It just suddenly RAINS.
Sun/rain

Also, not actually my fault that one can't smoke on a train, and that , due to some odd theory known only to MOTHER,, only whores smoke in the street, MOTHER was not a happy person until we got home, and in a daughterly gesture of sympathy , I let her smoke in the kitchen with the door open.

I am A SAINT!

On the domestic front....

This is my new iron. I know...almost as pathetic as when I bought the Dyson Vaccuum cleaner.
 This, is a fan fucking tastic iron let me tell you. It cost £99. It irons like a dream.
Unfortunately , I now have to buy a new ironing board to fit this massive iron on. It seems that such a board will cost me in the region of £50.
Never mind. If you have ironing done here, it costs £20 for 5 shirts .I iron everything, always have.
So I guess it's worth it.
If, when I was 16, someone had told me I would be so excited about an iron I would have killed myself right there and then.

I have now, as I have said before, totally become a Pom.
Today, when I received a parcel from Nespresso, the manufacturer of our coffee machine, with recycling bags enclosed for the spent coffee capsules, I did not think 'Kak! More recycling'
No, I thought 'What a good idea! How ecologically splendid'
Which it is.
Up until now, the coffee capsules cannot go in the food bin, as they have a tin covering. They cannot go with the tins as they have a food interior, so they had to go in landfill AND THAT IS A BAD THING!

Anniversary

I have been here 2 years! Can you believe that?
Not exactly to the day, seeing as due to MOTHER'S visit, I cannot spend time on my computer.
A few years ago I taught her to play games , e mail, and use Skype.
Jeez, that is biting me in the ass now. She has totally taken over my wee pee cee.
Never mind...
So, 2 years!
And I know I am a Pom.

I was speaking to Amiga Jane, and said..."well, you come to mine..."
AND, I say cardi and jumper...
Worst of all, I didn't actually say it, but I did think 'cack' before I said 'Kak'

Visits

It may sound like a small thing, but actually I am used to walking on the left hand side of people, MOTHER walks on my left, so I am on her right, it drives me fucking INSANE.
Just saying.................

Ssssshhhhh....

Visit is going well.

MOTHER is sleeping next to me, emitting small sores and farts  as I quietly type on the computer.
Soon her nap will be over and it will be time to feed her, entertain her for a while, and then take her out for a bit of fresh air.
Funny, I seem to remember having done this kind of thing before..... 

Wootton Bassett

There are some things that you should be informed about when you pass through passport control at Heathrow, and Wootton Bassett is one of them.

To my shame, I didn't know what it was. If  I had been pushed to answer, I would have said it was a football club.
Well? Chrystal Palace, Aston Villa....Wootton Bassett...Stupid Saffa

All the military funeral repatriations pass through the town.There was a programme on BBC about it... how sad and touching it was. All the old soldiers with their medals, all the families of the soldiers killed in Afganistan , all the townsfolk...they line the streets in respect and honour for our fallen soldiers.They come from far and wide, in their hundreds, every time a fallen soldier is sent home.

One mother in particular touched my heart. As her son came through the town in the hearse, she said " I did not cry today, I am very proud of my son, and would not like him to come home to see his mammy crying"

This year, 100 000 bikers came to the town in respect and honour of our dead. Every life lost here is respected. I like that.

Day out

MOTHER is visiting, so off we went to Hampton Court for a lovely family day out .
Actually, it was quite splendid, re-enactments of Henry the Eighth  , all in period costume, so-so weather, and a boat ride along the Thames to come home. Hampton Court is wonderful. I love it. Have been 4 times now, and still not seen all there is to see.

While we were having lunch, there was a
 blind /challenged girl, with a carer. The carer left her all alone while she went to get her own food/go to the loo/whatever. (kak carer actually)
What followed was a total comedy, as the birds all flocked down and were taking the blind/challenged girl's food, and other diners were going hysterical, chasing the birds away...looking in vain for the carer, in the end there were about 4 people 'en guarde' protecting this poor girl who was quite oblivious to it all.

We will be having many more days out. I shall report back. Harrods is our next trip.

MOTHER is quite charmed with Hoppy and all the squirrel dramas..it keeps her entertained for hours.This is a good thing, seeing as she gets up at about 5am and I don't.

Squirrel City

As you can clearly see...this is not Hoppy! This is a GIRL squirrel, who is either pregnant, or feeding babies.
She is starving hungry , so of course I have to feed her.
There is also another big bully squirrel who chases Hoppy and steals his Jaffa Cakes...Hoppy is a big wimp and is terrified of this squirrel, so now he sits on the table next to me and says 'eek eek' when the rogue squirrel appears.
Much as I don't like the new squirrel, I do feel sorry for him, but have to feed him at the end of the garden so that Hoppy doesn't get upset. He is not fond of the girl squirrel either, and when he says 'eek eek' he  waves his hands in the air. (He is becoming a bit of a drama queen)
My nerves are shot.

Pub

The Hubby has decided that this will be our local pub. It has to be the ugliest, most decrepit pub in the whole of London. The Hubby loves it because it is different, not mainstream, not actually even health and safety to be perfectly honest....I would prefer a wee pub with flowers in hanging baskets , next to the river, with swans and squirrels and piped classical music...but no. We attend this very odd pub in the theory it is 'interesting'  'avant garde' 'local colour'

Please will a Prince on a white horse come and sweep me and Hoppy away to a pub in Kensington??

 

Mystery Food

Any guesses will be welcome.. This comes in a stir fry pack of  'Super sprouting stir fry with edamame beans'
The beans, I know those.These are not they.

I did ask in Waitrose, and the fruit and veg staff answers ranged from 'Not a clue Love' to 'Never seen them before in my life'
I have not cooked them yet, but uncooked, they taste like a cross between coconut and raw potato.

Caring Poms

 This is truly amazing. Even the lowliest newspaper delivery person is cared for.

I am humbled in the face of Pom caring. And I am not taking the piss here. This was in our local paper.

Ankle update

Just in case anyone has been missing the regular whining about my ankle.
I can walk up AND down the stairs.
Down is much more difficult, but up is a doddle. I can even walk up carrying 2 cups of coffee.
I can bath myself, I walk like an (almost) normal person.
I can wear normal shoes.

But in case anyone is interested, IT HURTS LIKE FUCK.
Not all the time, but today especially.
Ow.

New Widget thing

I Love my globe (Thank you Hubby)
I wish I had done it ages ago as it seems to start from day now, and therefore does not log all my previous hits, including my  readers in  Iran , Russia, Luxembourg,  India , Germany, so many countries...who knew? ... Lordy!

Hoppy Update

I am V impressed with The Hubby...a squirrel ran along the fence while we were having our am. tea in the garden (like the Poms we are becoming) , and he said "That's not Hoppy"
And indeed, it was not Hoppy.
Hoppy has not been seen for more than a week , and I was starting to panic that he had been run over/ kidnapped /found another garden....but he did come back, WITH another girlfriend , who is not Lady GaGa.
This girlfriend is younger ( I can tell these things now, being an expert squirrel person)
We will see how long she lasts.
Am beginning to think Hoppy may be a bit of a Playa