Heath and safety

god forbid we should ever endanger ourselves by buying chicken....

Especially when it is hot

I did realise it was hot as I took it  out of the Tesco oven, and yes, I do know that a whole chicken has bones in it! 

Even herbs come with warnings....

Spring my Arse

Yes indeed, you get lulled into it with  Snowdrops, with Crocuses, with Daffodils, and you think...yay...spring! 

Not so much.

One lovely warm weekend getting to highs of 18C.

Pack away the warm Floofy winter jackets...must admit, against The Hubby's advice.

But , in my defence, The Hubby did change (briefly...hee hee, pardon the pun) from winter to summer undies...

Walk to Tesco today...

Waiting to walk...rain rain rain

Rain suddenly disappears .

Walk to Tesco

Too hot in t shirt and cardi and hoodie and blazer

Arrive at Tesco.

Take off blue hoodie, leaving only blazer and t shirt  and cardi

Shop

Walk home, having decided not to take bus (£2.70)

Cold cold arctic breeze

Stop and put blue hoodie jersey thing back on

5 minutes later, stop and take blue hoodie thing off

Wtf? 

Magic Lappie

Baby B received  many presents of this...

Neither Dr Lauren nor I knew what they were.

After about the fifth gift, we thought we had better find out.

Well...who knew? 

They are apparently a Must Have

They are called Taggies.

Developed by a clever mommy who noticed that babies love the tags on toys/blankies

With much scepticism, we decided to try this out on a Baby B 

Amazing! And she is way younger than the recommended age.

Every day is a school day! 

Who knew? 

Nisa Names

My local corner shop (cafe to the Saffas) is called Nisa.

I think I have previously mentioned that although I have called this particular franchise Neesa, it actually is called Nice er )

I know from working in a shop myself , that you give your customers names.

Sadly, found out today that I am known as Packet Lady.

This is because I have on a few occasions asked for a packet , which has caused much merriment and confusion.

I forget that they are called 'bags' in Pom speak.

So, actually a blessing that they don't call me "Bag Lady" 

I suddenly feel about 80 years old.

Alright?

I have been spending quite a bit of time " Oop North" 

The people there are amazingly  friendly , but I have an issue.

As a greeting, everyone says "Alright?"

I am unsure as to how to respond.

Is it like the South African "Howzit?" And you just say "Howzit" back?

Or does it require a response as in " I am fine, thank you . Are you alright?"

Does one say "Alright. Alright?"

Thus answering and asking at the same time?

Everyone says this, I kid you not.

Taxi drivers pick me up and say "Alright Flower?"

Shop people say "Alright?"

People pass you in the street and say "Alright?"

Sometimes there is no question mark.

Is this then a statement? Do I need to respond? 

Alright

Alright

Or is it Allright? Two l's?

It seems to be one "L"when they say it, but grammatically is it two 'L's?

Am I overthinking this? 

Any help would be gratefully received .

Not and but

The words 'not ' and 'but' are a dangerous combination.

To depoliticise them, let me give an example against myself.

I am not stupid, but I don't understand algebra.

So, any sentence containing "not " and " but"  must make you think.

Take out the " not " and "but"

Think again.

So, that sentence should read " I am stupid" 

Try it again.

I am not racist, but...

I am not homophobic , but..

See? 

Don't do it.

Royal Delivery Indeed

I am well impressed, as they say here.

Yesterday around three o' clock I posted a present for Baby B, small package, three second class stamps, popped into the postbox at the end of our street.

Arrived in Leeds this morning.

Totes Amazeballs ! 

Winter walks

The weather is lovely, truly...the sky is blue, the sun is shining, albeit a bit weakly, no icy wind, and I think we got to at least 8 C today! 

MOTHER is visiting.

She does not walk.

And the glorious weather today, as I perceive it, does not mean the same to her.

I went to the village on the bus with her this morning ( 15 minute walk) , but had to break free and let her take the bus alone to Tesco so that I could take the twenty minute walk there .

Now, in South Africa, this would never have happened. I took the good weather so much for granted.

Here, now that I have become such a Pom, blue skies make me step outside for a walk, I love it! 

I know it's only February and winter is far from over, but I feel quite optimistic. It's lighter in the mornings, no snow at all ( yet) no frost...how bad can it be? 

I really truly hope I don't have to eat these words! 

Going up?

Amazing.

North and South.

This is the road sign once we leave Cambridge.

I am not too sure where "The North " starts.

It's a bit of a joke apparently.

Londoners say it starts North of Watford.

East and West don't seem to figure that much.

I have now spent a few weeks "oop North"

I have been called 'duck' (pronounced dook) , Pet, and most charmingly of all... 'Flower'

Much more friendly folk there.

A lot of the time it's a bit tricky to understand the accent if they speak quickly, but you tend to tune in after a bit. 

Note to self: don't try too hard to blend in.

Saying "ey oop pet " to the postman in a Saffa accent may just be awfully wrong.

Also, I have got used to walking in Cambridge...flat

Walking in Leeds...not so much.

Is colder there. Pack a coat next time! 

Illegal Mail Alert

Indeed, I am both amused and impressed.

MOTHER sent a xmas parcel to Dr Lauren, not the main presents, just some stocking fillers for everyone.

It didn't arrive.

Much to our shock and surprise, as the Royal Mail is usually so good.

Upon enquiring after Xmas, MOTHER was given the parcel back.

 With a stern warning from the Post Office  and an official letter, listing items that are illegal to  post! 

Now, the illegal item was a pack of lighters for The Gorgeous Son.

With naked women on.

Go figure.

He doesn't smoke, but anyway.....

MOTHER lives in a tiny village up in Scotland.

There must be millions of parcels in the system at Xmas time.

If a flipping lighter can cause such a fuss...can you imagine! 

I feel very safe! 

There are many items you can't post, most of which are pretty obvious, but also prohibited are batteries, anything made in foreign prisons (?) I guess that would include Zippo lighters.  Dry ice, nail varnish remover....matches, and oddly, any lottery tickets except UK ones.

Also, hair dye and oven cleaner.

And porn. So MOTHER was illegal on 2 counts. 

Well, now we know .

Hee hee